My New Blog

Dear All,

I have just launched my new blog, with the domain :  Juz Simplicity.com .

I won’t be updating this blog and in the meanwhile, it’ll exists as it is and will remain dormant.

For the short period of about a month which this blog came into being, I am grateful and appreciate all who have kindly visited and commented on my posts, especially Slam Dunk whose comments from which I’ve learned much.

Please do visit my new blog and together we’ll learn something from each other.

Thank you.

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Two Mouths and One Ear

James 1:19 “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (NIV)

If you happened to come across a human being with two mouths and one ear, what would your immediate reaction and thought will be? Surprised ? Weird? Freak? Strange? Yes most probably you would. And the fact is that some people are, as they have two mouths and one ear, literally speaking. Many people talk more than listening.

Have you ever wondered why we were born with a mouth and a pair of ears? Or rather why God created us to be such. He wants us to be slow to speak and quick to listen. But are we?

Photo credit : Master languages Fast.com

Anger Management Made Simple

Anger can be especially difficult to manage. A well-known way of controlling anger is to take several deep breaths, releasing each one slowly. Do not focus on the source of anger as it will only increase your angry emotion. When you begin getting angry with someone, take time to listen to what the other person has to say. Choose to give a friendly smile of understanding, appreciation, or patience as you listen to the other side of the story; and make sure it is a real smile—not a sarcastic grin.

Avoid the companion of angry people. We really do become like the people with whom we spend the most time. Proverbs 22:24 states, “Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man; do not associate with one easily angered.”

Anger is an emotional warning light that tells us something is wrong. The key to dealing with anger is learning to express it correctly. We can control anger instead of allowing it to control us. Another way to diffuse your anger is to excuse yourself, take a short break away from the situation in order to gain the right perspective. If possible, go for a walk to work off anger. Physical activity is a good source as an outlet for anger. Simple regular physical exercise, like walking daily for 30-minutes can improve our overall state of mind and lessen the occurrence and intensity of our anger.

Good listening habit helps in anger management. Take time to listen to what the other party is saying. Make sure to understand his/her views. Processed and analyse that information before replying. Do not be on the offensive and defensive. Explain your stance calmly.

Try to put a smile on your face the next time you are angry. It is difficult to be upset when you are smiling and it is one of the best and most affordable anger management tips as you can do it anytime, anywhere, any situation and to anyone.

The best way to manage anger is to prevent it in the first place by balancing your schedule and priorities. Manage your time as you will not be stressed out by rushing into things. Have enough sleep so that you will not be in a state of exhaustion. Take your meals on time so as not to upset your body mechanism.

We can learn to control our emotions through proper habits that will help in developing attitudes and discipline our emotions towards a peaceful and calm personality.

Image Courtesy of Chapak

Character

A friend was appalled by a remark that her daughter’s 10-11 year-old male classmate posted on her (daughter’s) social networking profile. It was a four lettered vulgar word. Does character matters?

A good character make the difference between living a successful life or a life of unpleasantly. In this materialistic world, where material wealth is the ultimate goal, we’ve  unfortunately forgotten that good character is important.

Environment, medias, peers, and parents interactions, words and actions profoundly affect the character building of a child as his/her actions are primarily based on others’ influence.

Teens who rise above habitual bad behaviour are usually achievers. Parents are responsible for their children’s behaviour and take note that the more you make character-building decisions, the more your children can be positively influenced by your example.

Parents who teach their children the benefits of good character, molds them to be responsible persons who practice good character and will have a head start in life. This will help them to succeed in life.

Children’s mind are malleable. Clinical studies show that a child’s character begins formation in the mother’s womb and by age 5 a child’s attitude and character are shaped.

Parents must not only correct and teach their children good moral character values, but also must exhibit and demonstrate to them. Guide them to exercise their capacity to choose between good and bad. When your child knows the basics of good character, he’s half way through. The other half is from your guidance and his/her desire to follow through with doing what’s right and avoid the bad.

Ask any parents, and they’d want their children to have good moral character knowing that high moral standards will serve them well in life.

Blaming moral decays on today’s insurmountable medias is a lame excuse for parents. The mistakes some parents made are that they only educate their offsprings about the good sides. They need to emphasize that differentiating between the good and bad and their consequences are important too.

Young people probably don’t give much thought about character, whether good or bad. They prefer to follow their peers and the latest trends.

Your kid may want to put a premium on good character, but because of peers’ or medias influences which do not emphasize on character building, they may think they are an oddity and strange. If your child’s company is not right, help him/her get out of there immediately. Proverbs 13:20 says : “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”

Do you want your children to build and exercise good character? This depend on what you want them out of their life. You may want them to have a happy, secured, and a successful life. Most, if not all parents do. Made them focus on doing right things instead of allowing others’ negative character to shape their thinking. Don’t let those bad influences of others to rob your children of the good things in life.

To build a good character involves sacrifice and effort. As a parent, when you began noticing the difference between good and bad choices (no matter how insignificant the choices may be) your child made, you can help him/her to start changing. Even by just uttering an unkind or vulgar word is enough to ring the alarm bell. As parents, you need to act, and fast.

Character matters. Good character definitely make the difference between a successful life or a life of regrets and frustrations on your child. We are frequently bombarded with the false premise that good character doesn’t count, except material wealth. This outlook is false. Do not follow the world which is morally corrupt. Take charge and make character building your priority.

Keep Going

A friend of mine always laments about this or that – I’d want to or like to do, but I don’t have the time or she’ll say, I know I’m wrong, and I cannot forgive myself.

Know one’s weakness or fault is good and I believe most people do eventually find out the reason(s) for their mistakes. Full stop and that is. They never make an effort to learn and correct their mistakes. Gradually, they’ll repeat the mistakes even though knowing they shouldn’t. They looked back, regret, and wait…and wait. All these hinder progress.

This brings to the question of attitude which is responsible for almost every thought, outlook and our focus on things we have throughout life’s journey. The complexity of our thoughts leave the possibilities wide open for just about anything.

There was an article about a study done on concentration camp survivors to determine the common characteristics of those who did not die from disease or starvation. Victor Frankl was a living answer to that question. Before the Nazis threw him into a concentration camp, he was a successful psychiatrist. After his rescue, Victor Frankl traveled the world, sharing his story: “There is only one reason why I am here today. You kept me alive. Others gave up hope. I dreamed that someday I would be here telling you how I, Victor Frankl, had survived the Nazi concentration camps. I’ve never been here before, I’ve never seen any of you before, and I’ve never given this speech before. But in my dreams, I have stood before you and said these words a thousand times.”

Outlook determines outcome. Victor Frankl survived because he chose a right focus, keeping his eyes fixed on what was ahead.

There are times when life can seem like an unscalable mountain. If we stop and do not make an effort to continue climbing, we’ll never ever reach the summit.

Anyone who has have experienced climbing a mountain will tell you that waiting or resting will not bring  down the summit. A mountain does not get smaller because we wait for the size to decrease. The only way that we get closer to the top is by taking one step at a time. An amazing transformation takes place as we climb the mountain ahead of us—it appears smaller until finally we are on the top.

We all face disappointments and failures. To be successful, we have to refuse to accept failure. Colonel Sanders, the founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken, was rejected on many occasions, laughed at about his attire of his starched white shirt and white pants. However, Sanders persevered, and after a little over 1,000 visits, he finally persuaded Pete Harman in South Salt Lake, Utah to partner with him. They launched the first “Kentucky Fried Chicken” site in 1952. The rest of the story, as they say, is history.

Failures, disappointments, trials can sometimes seem too much to handle, but we can overcome them and succeed by first beginning to climb. Don’t stop. Keep going.

Interruptions

Have you heard the story of the farmer’s donkey that fell down into a well? The animal cried pitifully for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do.

Finally he decided since the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway, it just wasn’t worth it to retrieve the donkey. So, the farmer invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed shovels, and began to shovel dirt into the well.

At first, when the donkey realized what was happening, he cried horribly. Then, to everyone’s amazement, he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well, and was astonished at what he saw.

With every shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off, and take a step up on the dirt as it piled up. As they continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well, and trotted off!

The moral of the story :  ‘Life’s journey is not and can never be smooth and uninterrupted always. Along the way we are bound to encounter winding and bumpy roads. Sometimes unpleasant or unexpected things happen like falling into a pit like the donkey. Waiting for a ladder then will  not be easy. Instead shovels of dirt will rain down on you. Each shovel is trial and tribulation and can be one of the most joyous or terrifying moments of your life.

Joyous to some as it means an opportunity, a challenge, a stepping stone to the top and terrifying to others as it will bury them.

As C. S. Lewis so aptly put it, “We must stop regarding unpleasant or unexpected things as interruptions of real life. The truth is that interruptions are real life.”

Just Do It


Cartoons by Andertoons

One of the first rules of accomplishment is that you do not have to feel good or in the right mood in order to do something. Accomplishment and goals are reached by rolling up our sleeves and working toward it.

When our goals are not achieved, we may experience discouragement, which over time can turn into depression and even despair – the absence of hope.

Somehow we seem to have slipped into thinking that if we do not feel good or not in the right mood, we are off the hook for doing something that is to be done. This has little to do with doing it.

Word and image lock and control the mind, that is, “lock” our minds into conventional patterns of perceiving, thinking, and speaking that determine our enthusiasm and effort working toward our accomplishment and goal.

Feeling good or in the right mood are not a prerequisite for doing things. Forget about excuses, however relevant or good they may be, or not having the ambition. That will result in not moving and getting things done at all. Excuses are just excuses, no other definition, period. They are usually stepping-stones toward failure.

Are you familiar with the phrases, “I don’t feel like it”or “I’m not in the mood” and used them yourself? When a job needs doing or something needs to be done, then that should be the motivation for doing what is needed.  In life there will be many times when we will not “feel like it” or “not in the mood.” When something needs doing—just do it!